Jackfruit

Isegi AI ei suuda välja sõeluda, mis selle vilja eestikeelne nimi on, variandid näiteks: kikkapuu, leivapuu, jaka, jakkvili. Ehk et vali lemmik.

Hägune tunne on, et korra olen mingeid sellemaitselisi närimiskomme Kyoto laboris suveniiriks tooduna näinud-maitsnud, aga kuna sealsamas kõrvalpakis olid ka durianimaitselised, peale millede avamist pidin hoonest haisu tõttu evakueeruma, siis pead selle eest ei anna.

Täitsa kindlasti aga olid mõned kuud tagasi Gyomus müügil "Jackfruit Chips" siltidega pakid, millest paar tükki ka koju tõime, enne kui need tüüpilise Gyomu asjaajamise kombel lõplikult õhku haihtusid. Nämm! Jah, haisesid need ka. Jah, natuke kibe maitse oli kurgus. Jah, kuidagi limased olid ka (kuivatatud küll, aga niipea kui suhu jõudsid...) Aga no niiiii head maitsesid.

Ja siis eile D leidis sama poe külmikust värske külmutatud Jaagu. Olime targad, valisime koju toomiseks juba puhastatud variandi, mitte veerandiku sellest ogalisest jurakast, mis, tuleb välja, selle puuvilja algkuju on. Ja taaskord tuleb tõdeda, et nämm! Lihtsalt otse külmutatult toorelt närida - nagu mahlajäätis.

Soovitused on seda ka banaani ja ananassiga smuutiks mikserdada, katsetab, kui järgmine kord mahti on poodi minna.

Cheers,

Hedi

Experiments in-progress

Home-made vanilla extract:

• 2 720mL bottles of 40% vodka, 10 each of 2 different types of vanilla beans (Indonesian and er.. Madagasque? Is that a word? Nope, Malagasy seems to be the actually existing one...)
• Pour a little bit of the vodka out, cut the beans open lengthwise, stick them in the bottle so every bit is definitely covered to avoid unwanted growth of anything, cap it and leave to stand for some months up to years.
• In a few months can start using the extract a bit at a time, every 6-ish months topping up with high percentage vodka and fresh beans.
• 2 bean types under comparison, because of course they are.
• In addition made a tiny quantity with each of the beans using bourbon as the solvent.
• Results pending.

Chilli honey:

• Harvest 2 fresh habaneros, wash, slice (gloves!!!) and stick them into about 100mL of liquid honey. (Most recipes recommend a lower amount of chilli per honey, in fact. Some also suggest using dried, not fresh peppers.)
• Close jar cap, mix, let stand.
• The chillies have a lower density than honey, so they rise to the top and mixing is necessary to lessen contamination risk at the surface.
• By the next day the honey has gained some viscosity due to whatever chemical processes are going on, and is therefore a lot more fluid than original.
• NB! Jar has to be opened every day because some of those processes include gas-producing fermentation, so unless de-gassed, the jar will simply explode at one random point. Do not want.
• Let ferment 1-4 weeks, use as condiment.
• Results pending.

Cheers,

Hedi

Broccoli microgreens

Have a high level of sulforaphane, supposedly useful for combating insulin resistance, visceral fats, inflammations and a load of other things. Not certain about any of that.

But they also just taste really good.

However, sprouts, and to a lesser extent microgreens, are also one of the food groups that while available for purchase in most supermarkets nowadays, really really should not be bought unless you are very certain you know how to determine whether there is anything wrong with them, and also have a very good nose, since they are extremely easily contaminated with severely harmful microorganisms. (If smell is off in Any Way, do not eat!)

Sprouts are worse on the contamination-ease scale than microgreens, so I chose the latter method to start the domestic experiments. (Sprouts - you germinate the seeds washing and mixing the whole thing constantly, the tiny "plant" has no way to grow properly, so you end up eating the whole thing with root, shoot, left-over seed shells. Microgreens - germinate the seeds on flat surface, water without moving the sprouted plantlets so they grow normally upwards and the shoots can be cut and eaten without the root, therefore avoiding the tissues that have been constantly wet and thus have a higher probability of being "off". Smell!!)

Need a growing setup of some sort of perforated tray that fits on top of a waterproof undertray. Plastics, silicones, metal, glass, combined ones available commercially in various shapes and sizes, can also improvise with whatever you happen to have at home. I went with commercial stainless steel trays due to suitable size and ability to heat-sterilise them in an oven.

3 types of seeds from Amazon as a test - 2 originating from Italy with some sort of organic labelling, 1 from the states I think (already discarded all the packs, can't be bothered to go check right now). Main restriction is to avoid seeds sprayed with any sort of fertilisers or pesticides meant for single-sowing and growing into large broccoli plants in soil. Besides that, the seeds for sprouts are the exact same used for microgreens are the exact same used for the garden broccoli, so don't get cheated by all the "microgreen seeds" labelling.

Trial-and-error so far:

1. Plastic tupperware boxes with wet kitchen towel inside, lid open in the corner, set onto kitchen counter, no sterilisation of anything. Have successfully used this method in the past for sprouting micro-radishes. Did not work at all for brokkoli. Watering disturbed the sprouts so the plants ended up being somewhere between the micro and the sprout stage, all messed up, some attached to the tissue, some not, impossible to sort out for eating. One of the three boxes (one type of seeds, the US one) also developed distinctly contaminated smell - straight to trash. Out of other two boxes, got about 5 shoots to taste. 
2. Metal tray stack, sterilised in an oven for 10 minutes, max heat. Italian seeds pre-soaked for half a day, spread thinly directly on the perforated metal (after cooling, of course), no "substrate" imitation used. Bottom tray filled with normal water and that water changed every day. Second full metal tray set upside down on top to lessen evaporation and give seedlings the dark-signal to germinate. Here onwards everything on small table under a half-way UV-blocking window, since that's the lightest we can go. Room temperature (right now swinging between 15 and 30 degrees). Did not work either. Seeds did germinate, even if they were rolling around the tray every time I moved anything, about a third of them actually formed shoots, but even those did not push roots down into the water reservoir and therefore dried out as soon as I took the top cover off to let them green up. Got maybe ten-fifteen shoots out of this batch.
3. Metal trays, sterilised in the oven max temp 20 minutes, let cool. Second type of Italian seeds, half of tray covered with regular thick not-easily breakable paper kitchen towel, other half with the special fish-drying cloth-paper commonly used in Japan in both commerce and at home. Seeds rinsed with regular water before sowing sparsely. All water used from here onwards: filtered tap water, boiled, put into large metal bottle to cool overnight and used the following day. Tissues moistened every couple of days carefully from the edge so as not to disturb the sprouts. Water in bottom tray also changed every couple of days. Seeds grew proper roots straight through the "fish paper" into the water, and worked out properly. The kitchen towel side had zero root growth through it, so all seedlings failed once the cover was off. Amount of sprouts gotten - one meal's worth.
4. Metal trays sterilised in oven, all water filtered, boiled, cooled. Half toilet paper, half normal thin and breakable "facial" (nose-blowing) tissue. US seeds, densely sown. Tissues moistened and bottom water changed every couple of days. Cover on for about 3 days, then another 3 in light. Worked like miracle. From the looks of it nearly all seeds germinated, enough microgreens for about 8 meals.

So, to sum up so far:

• Sterilise trays and boil water.
• Use a layer of clean facial tissue as substrate on perforated tray.
• Seeds matter - continuing tests with various ones from different sources.
• Sow seeds densely, they physically support eachother while growing and also lessen evaporation from the surface.
• Leave space to the edges of the tray/tissue to add water and cover the top whilst in the "dark" period.
• Change bottom water every second day (also rinse the tray with boiling water while at it).
• When shoots 4cm tall, remove cover and give as much light as possible.
• Edible in about a week from the start of process, after greening can keep on tray for another week.

Cheers,

Hedi

Ülitäpne pestoretsept

Jõua aastaajaga lõpuks sinnamaani, et öösiti õues külm ja katseks* istutatud basiilikutaim hakkab närbuma.

Avasta, et pole sellest veel kordagi süüa teinud.

Veena kodustatud palvetajaritsikas mõneks ajaks sellelt paprikataimele kolima.

Korja sõelatäis lehti, sorteeri, pese, kuivata.

Lisa plastikkarbitäis vana sügavkülmutatud basiilikut.

Mõned mandlid.

Teadmata kogus oliiviõli. (Rohkem, kui tundub, et vaja peaks minema.)

Kolm küüslauguküünt. (Mis oli tegelikult tiba liiast.)

Teadmata kogus laabijuustu. (Emme saatis!)

DO NOT FORGET THE LEMNOSES! (Ehk et tegelikult pidi retseptis sidrun või laim ka sees olema, mida meil kodus olema ei juhtunud, küll aga sai jupp aega paella + ex + lemnoses jutu peale naerda.)

Purusta kõik mikseris massiks.

Sega värske pasta ja eelnevalt küpsetatud hakklihaga.

Riivi veel natuke juustu peale riputamiseks.

Oiii, kui nämm!

2x2 portsionit sai. Mitte et see kuidagigi aitaks kedagi. Tuleb lihtsalt koostisosi jupphaaval lisada ja iga iteratsiooni maitsta, kuni meeldib, mis muud.

Peale ööd külmkapis "marineerumist" oli veel parem!

*Ma vannun, see liik ei salli mind. Mitmeid kordi kasvatada üritanud eri tingimustes, no ei taha edeneda kõige muuga võrreldes. Ja samal ajal peetakse kõige lihtsamalt ülalpeetavaks ürdiks üldse... Igatahes, jonni jätmata panin järjekordselt ühe suve keskel potti, sedapuhku isegi kasudega. Vähemalt Puudel, kes seal põõsa sees magamas käib öösiti tundub hindavat asja.

Cheers,

Hedi

Banana bread

Had, yet again, some about-to-rot bananas in the fridge. Not sure what the issue is, but lately all that I buy go off at about 4x the normal speed, I swear. Am aware that banana bread exists. So...

Never made any before (yes, I did get through the pandemic without it), so started from here, then got annoyed at how the (mobile) website was set up and needed excessive amounts of scrolling to get to the points, not to mention all the ads, so proceeded to improvise.

Main findings:

The amount of sugar in an American recipe is BONKERS! By default lessened the amount prescribed and the result was still absurdly sweet. Next time 1/2 sugar, no more. No wonder there seem to be no human sized humans left there...

Making of the whole recipe only used one large and one small bowl, a couple of spoons and the baking trough making the process from prep to cleanup incredibly low effort. And I am all for that.

What I actually did + note for next time:

1. Peel 4 small bananas into large mixing bowl, smush them with a fork - this actually hurt my hand, not sure whether due to body condition or whether the bananas were actually less ripe than they looked or what, in any case need to think about better mashing method, maybe slice before? Also, better to use 5 small bananas.
2. Break 3 eggs on top of the bananamush and whip them with the fork first without disturbing the bottom layer to get some air in there, then all together.
3. Weigh 60g of unsalted (duh!) butter and about 20g of coconut oil into small ceramic bowl, put into micro for 30 sec to melt, mix, another 30 sec heat, onto counter to cool, then pour into main bowl.
4. 1 tablespoon of vanilla extract into the main bowl.
5. Add 1 teaspoon of baking soda.
6. 1/2 teaspoon of salt.
7. 100g of low processed cane sugar - recipe was 150g of white chemical sugar, 100g of a more normal one turned out to be excessive, next time 75g of the least processed I have.
8. 225g of various (mostly) gluten free flours (this time had about 75g of leftover rye flour mix, 1 megatablespoon / around 20g of potato starch, and the rest of the amount was made up with "premade gluten free rice flower for baking", which I presume also had some "gluten imitating chemicals" because there were absolutely no issues with the dough rising or keeping shape after cooling. With a different flour mix might actually have to mess around with xantham gum etc.
9. 5 scoops of dried cranberries because I had them and thought to make it more interesting - turns out D really did not like that idea, so fine, no extra fruit next time.. sad me. Making this for anyone else, I think dried pineapple bits would be awesome. Just need to lessen the amount of sugar even further then. Wet fruit would make cooking the loaf thoroughly more complicated.
10. Oven to preheat at 180C - 170 next time, the top got too brown too fast.
11. Cooking paper to line a pyrex loaf mold, a tablespoon of coconut oil spread in it for yummier crust.
12. Batter into the mold, into oven.
13. Cook at 180 C for about 30 min, then realise the temperature is a bit too high and turn it to 170 for about another 30 min - next time just do 170C and 1 hr, obviously. May also experiment with brushing the crust with coconut oil or egg mix in the hopes to keep it unburnt and less cracked?
14. Toothpick test.
15. Discard the instructions to wait until cool and serve immediately with a piece of chocolate to melt on top. Vanilla ice cream would be great too. I mean, like it wasn't with pretty much any baked good ever...

Cheers,

Hedi

When a hunt goes wrong

Many years ago we learnt that it is possible to get a stuck gecko off of gluey fly paper by soaking the attachment points in drops of cooking oil. Useful to know when the little fellows get it into their heads that the pile of flies on the pretty yellow tablecloth has been served up for their feast.

This morning I spent hours assisting Poodle (sometimes also known as a bat, from the species Frankie, in reality a mama praying mantis we've been feeding and employing as the habanero plant protector for a couple of months, who also just laid her first massive eggsack under the edge of our "garage" roof a few days ago) clean off some insanely sticky substance she had gotten herself covered with.

Poor thing was literally starving, glued to a leaf in the morning unable to use her front feet at all, since all of the (numerous and bending at weird angles - these guys are fascinating!!) joints were also stuck together. Guessing that the jelly was actually dried out slug goo, D used a tiny paintbrush to soak her legs in water a drop every couple of minutes until she got her joints moderately unstuck and some hope back into her. Snipped off the leaf and brought her indoors where the warmth and relative safety helped motivate her to keep trying to save herself. Toothpick, brush, several sets of tweezers, a pile of napkins and a fuckton of looking at minuscule things and patience - got most of the larger chunks of slug off in about 1.5 hours with no damage done. For the next few I sat at the kitchen table on which she was in turns committed to climbing up my shoulder, staring into my face, getting pissed off at all the goo and swinging clumped feet wildly about, gesticulating that she wants to be fed (which we eventually did while she was still sticky all over - oh what a mess, but she really needed the energy to keep going), getting obsessed with D's moving toes on the sofa half the room away or the shiny metal water bottle, and taking time to chew off some chunks of the slime and try to spit them out. That last turned out to be rather difficult, because - pure glue. Which is why we proceeded in a cycle of chew - try to spit - get mouth wiped by the corner of a tissue by me to remove the goop - soak leg - chew - spit - tissue -... 

NOT what I expected to be doing for the entire morning today, but does explain why for a no apparent reason, I woke up convinced that I need to stay at home from lab today. Life.

Note - this is a very domesticated mantis, used to being close to us, getting hand-fed, sitting on people etc. There is absolutely no way a wild one (like Sneak currently living on the other side of our house) would have tolerated this treatment without completely panicking and seriously hurting herself in the process of trying to flee. Also, I had (clairvoyantly freed up) time, a good eyesight and enough patience. So now she is back on her pepper, basking in the sun and licking her hands clean of several rounds of sandwiches (the insanely harmful Chinese Grasshopper Moths hell bent on (and succeeding in) destroying all of the native and food-producing plant life).

Cheers,

Hedi

Bit cut from a book review because it got too ranty for that site, nothing to do with food... even though there is a cook in the book... hey, that rhymed :P

I now have exactly one instance of AI being useful to show. Even if I had to wrangle the f'ing thing out of lying to my face over and over again.

For the past 30 years I've occasionally recalled the very first book I read in English that got lost somewhere after I had finished with it - probably lent out so some nasty kid who never returned it. The entire time, therefore, I had no idea what the title or the author was. Today got an idea to ask the robot based on what keywords I recalled, namely: children's book, in English, Molly-Polly twin sisters characters, striped shirts and constantly arguing with eachother, sideways pony tales in opposite directions, illustrated, language-based jokes and puns, traditionally published, colourful hard cover. Aber natürlich, with complete and total certainty it claimed I could only mean one specific German series and listed the same keywords I had just given it, albeit in a nice bulleted and "expanded" list. I ask for details, it helpfully tells me "here's the cover", confirm it is correct. While showing no image whatsoever. Called out on this, it displays some book covers in German. I ask for English, again. It assures me, that, yes, it is in English. I ask for cover pictures in English, it suddenly finds that whoops, actually these books never were published in English after all. But this is still the correct book, because there are twins with the pointy pony tails on the cover illustration (of the German one). Which there were not and of which I had to inform the thing again. And so on several rounds. It's outright maddening to have to argue with a computer of all things about every single word it is blatantly lying about. But, nonetheless, eventually I did get to the correct book, so - a positive score of 0.001 to AI?

Ooh, the title rhyme I stumbled upon must have been inspired by recently rewatching old 'Allo 'Allo! episodes again. "Do you not see? That if you kill him with the pill from the till by making with it the drug in the jug, you need not light the candle with the handle on the gâteau from the château."

Cheers,

Hedi

Well job!

Is what happens when the random-Shiraz-to-accompany-Friday-dinner turns out to be a lot better than expected, and as a result the brain thinks it's going into a graphomany phase, while in fact just not being sober enough to choose between two expressions and ends up parallel processing them both.

Cheers,

Hedi

Pimp noodles...

... are a variation of vague noodles where aubergines are swapped out for broccoli and pineapple, and green peas for green beans in the veggie part of the dish. Name stemming from the increasingly infuriating autowronger of our current messaging app/digital keyboard. 

Seriously, how bad can you make it?? A few examples from the ten minute convo half an hour ago:

• "Disgusting" was changed to "fish", trying to type it again turned it into "distant".
• Whatever the heck this is "So tjivhg for tomów?"
• Meanwhile "Do I get the minx 9r not" is not corrected in any way.
• An effort to convey that I am happy to put broccoli and beans into the dish -"If you want to do brokoli break based vague, I'm happy with that". Tried to clarify, managed "Brokkoli, beans". Once again and: "Bread".
• Some sort of food item got turned into "With brolly", upon asking for clarification: "Brolly is an umbrella but I gave none."
• "Doesn5 matter.. Nee dsugar anyway" is another example of the perfect correction functionality.
• Apples morphed into "apps and grapefruit", while also being "carap".
• And a few sentences later, instead of conveying my message about laundry, the grapefruits randomly showed up again in the form of: "Was raining.. On my grapefruit.... Not Hauptfigur... Offffffssssake". At which point I gave up and decided that whatever the heck we'll end up with for dinner will be just fine with me, and ran to save my poor rained-upon bedsheets.

Cheers,

Hedi

Seni nimetu segadus

Kui kodus nii kartulid kui kõrvitsamägi kui läätsed kui tatar kui leib kui riis olemas, aga neist ühtegi valmistada ei viitsi parajasti, miks mitte õhtusöögi süsivesikute (ja mitte süsivesinike - küll on segadusseajavad sõnad) portsjon popkorniga (ja selle sõna eestikeelset kirjapilti pidin just roboti käest küsima... täna on keelega keeruline jälle... aga plaksumais - no ei, keeldun!) asendada. Täpsustuseks - tegu puhta õhkkuumutis plahvatatud maisiga, ei mingit õli, ei mingit soola. Hunnik kaussi, mõned lusikatäied varasemat pikakeedulihapudi, natuke juustu, natuke kastet, soovi korral tšilliviile ja tulemus on midagi poutine-laadset. Restoranitoiduks ei kutsu, aga ajas asja ära.

Et ausalt kõik üles tunnistada, minu idee see ei olnud, ja lubasin täpsustada, et idee sugenes ENNE džinn-toonikut.

Cheers,

Hedi

Air fryer - minu uusim sõber

Peale mitut aastat aeg-ajalt sellest loomast kuulmist ja mitte aru saamist, milleks teda vaja, kui ahi ja grill ja mikro ja pliit ja riisikeedumasin olemas, sigines meile kööki mõni nädal tagasi masin nimega air fryer. Ei ole seni suutnud talle sobilikku maakeelset nime külge pookida.. hmm.. õhufritüür? Tohoh, ongi kuumaõhufritüür? (Kui guugel mulle jälle näkku ei valeta muidugi - see previous post.) 

Noh - peale esmast sisse lülitamist on asi kasutuses olnud vähemalt ühe, kui mitte kahe eine valmistamiseks iga jummala päev. Absoluutselt ei osanud seda ette näha ja nüüd kahetsen, et D mulle aastaid tagasi sel teemal auku pähe ei rääkinud. (Tal oli reaalne kogemus, millele toetuda, aga vana verisoon kolis enne mind välja.) Muidugi mudel, mille nüüd hankisime, on hulka paremini soovide järgi tuunitud, kui siis (enne kui asi popiks läks) saadaval oleks olnud, niiet all's well that... Klaasist küpsetuskauss, et söögiga kokku puutuva tefloni kogust vähendada ja et sisu seisu masinat avamata näeks. Tüüpilise ühe käega välja libistatava metallküna asemel kahe käega pealt kõrvale tõstetav kaas (ja segamiseks silikoonspaatel) - need sahtlid nimelt tekitavad kangi põhimõttel iga kontrollimise ajal randmesse nii suure surve, et selle aja peale kui toit valmis, ei saaks mu alalõpmata vigane käsi enam söögiriistade hoidmisega hakkama. Lisaks, kui kaas pealt ära, lülitab kütteelement end automaatselt välja, seega pole ohtu, et unustad asja tööle, kui sahtliga kuskile serveerima lähed.

Miks hea? Ruumisäästlik - 30x30x30cm on meie oma kuskil. Ajasäästlik ja hands-off lahendus - viskad toidu sisse ja tegeled millegi muuga, paar korda segad või pöörad suurema tüki külge. Küpsetamine kuuma ringleva õhuga. Väike ruumala kuumutada, seega energiasäästlikum kui praeahi, ja ei mingit eelsoojendamist, lülitad sisse, peaaegu kohe temperatuur laes. Õli ei pea üldse lisama (või kui, siis paar pritsutist spraypudelist.. ei tea õiget sõna jälle), seega tervislikum. Aga tulemus saab mingi maagia läbi ideaalselt krõmpsu koorikuga (ja mõni meist on sellest sõltuvuses). 20-25 minutit ja valmis nii toorvorstid kui värskest kartulist lõigutud friikad. Isegi praemuna tegime vorstist välja jooksnud õlis klaasanuma põhjas (sel puhul järgnev küll ei kehti, aga muidu sisse söödava rasva kogust vähendab see ka, et toit resti peal, välja tilkunud jura viskab üldiselt minema.) Kasutatav nii sügavkülmutatud, toore kui juba küpsetatud toidu tarbeks. See viimane siis millegi eksisteeriva üles soojendamiseks. Eri programmid, temperatuurid, taimerid.

Ainus mure meil hetkel, et köögi on keegi geenius nii ehitanud, et seinas on üks pistikupesa. Millesse on ühendatud (pikendus... ee.. laiendusjuhtmega?) külmkapp, mikrolaine/praeahi, mikser, riisikeetja, tolmuimeja laadija, kuivatuskapp ja nüüd siis ka fritüür. Ja korraga kannatab kasutada neist maksimaalselt kahte, kui sedagi (oleneb mis programmi mingi masin parajasti sooritab, ehk et mis vool konkreetselt läbi pääsema peab), enne kui korgid välja lööb. Ja jah, meil on igasugused lisakontrollid ja maandused ja lülitid jne selle puntra haldamiseks, tulekustuti pealekauba, aga ikkagi "No common sense was harmed in the building of this house, because none was present" situatsioon.

Ja kas ma tšillide kuivatamisest juba kirjutasin? Me sattusime (etteaimatavalt) suveks paari tudengite farmindusklubi peenraid hooldama. Kuu tagasi tekkis selle tulemusel jalapeñouputus. Mina neid süüa ei suuda, D'le meeldivad vägaväga. Aga iga päev kümmet kauna ei suuda isegi tema tarbida. Kummikindad kätte (seda õppetundi mul mitu korda vaja ei ole, D sai omad vitsad ka kätte sedapuhku), pesta, 3mm viiludeks lõikuda (seemned sees) ja 4-8 tunniks fritüüri 80C juures kuivama. Pidada ülihead olema!

Cheers,

Hedi

2+2=5

Ongi käes.

"Madam Butterfly" purutee oli mul teismeliseeas igas Eesti Selveri jmt poe lahtise tee sektsioonis saadaval - totaalne nostalgialemmik seega. Mõni aasta tagasi juba tuli igatsus, uurisin, kust saaks, ei leidnud. Nädal tagasi veetsin kõva tunni guugeldades, et kas päriselt ei eksisteeri enam mitte kuskil seda, tulin arvuti tagant ära veendumusega, et jah tõepoolest, enam ei toodeta, ja kuna kuskil Euroopas on mingi muu ülipeen tee sama nimega, ju siis see Eesti oma sattus nime pärast pahandustesse vmt. Jagelesin otsingumootoritega veel veidi, leidsin vähemalt selle info, et "Seitse Samuraid" ehk võrreldav lemmik, on Prismades veel müügil. Niiet kribasin empsile, et kas saab otsima minna. Paar minutit hiljem saan vastu teepoe lingi, kus mitte ainult samuraid, vaid ka liblikad täiesti olemas, müügil, tellitavad.

Lihtsalt see põrgu põhja käia võiv kompott AIst, otsingumootoritest, suurfirmade kontrollist jne lihtsalt ei võimaldagi seda infot siit maalt leida. Mis siis, et 100% teadlik on, et ma Eestist ja endiselt kohaga seotud. Mis siis, et erinevaid otsinguvariante erinevates keeltes igate pidi sisestasin. Mis siis, et konkreetselt Eesti tulemusi nõudsin. Mis siis, et isegi lõpuks ühe neetud roboti käest infot küsisin.

Ja isegi peale nädalat sel teemal surfamist, otse empsi saadetud saidil kolamist jne, otsingumootoritest EI OLE VÕIMALIK seda infot kätte saada. Katse on muuseas korratav - lasin D'l sama asja läbi teha. Positiivseks kontrolliks VPN (mida enesel ei ole küll hetkel) Eesti peale lülitada - imedeime, tee on jälle eksistentsi saavutanud ja müügil mitte ainult ühes poes või saidil, vaid erineva hinnaga tervest hulgast allikatest saadaval.

Vot nii eraldatud kastides istume me nüüdseks siis - usu jah, mis infot näed. Hurra.

Noncheers,

Hedi

Variance

In some sort of "want to write random things" period. Been a while.

Thought of the day:

As much as I can see, the difference between going deeper into the lore/universe/politics/world/ etc of Star Trek vs that of Star Wars is that the prior offers endless hope through difficulties, whereas the latter is depressively real and realistically depressive. Probably says something about the diehard fans of both. Surface-level "seen the movies" knowledge does not count. 

Expansion on that:

Tolkien summed up would fall into the second category. Discworld into the first. Hitchhiker has to get ripped in two according to the time of life of Adams whilst writing. Potter - first. Alice - second. Everything by Asimov - absurdly hopeful. Still haven't read enough past Ender to make the final judgement there. Dune likely into the second, but it's been a very long time since I read it. Narnia can go and kill itself off like it so wants to, therefore also assuredly the second. Earthsea - also a doomed world. And I'm also going to throw Acotar into the list and in the first category despite it desperately trying to pretend to be deep. What else... Poirot, regardless of a trail of dead bodies, definite beacon of hope. And the Elderlings, during reading of which I've probably cried the most in total, also belongs in the first. Cassie Clare's stuff - leaning towards the second, Roth's - first. Zelazny's everything - second, but sort of hiddenly so. Buffy - second. Everything by Lindgren automatically into the first. GOT should be an equally automatic second, but for some reason I hesitate here - yes, disasters and terror everywhere, but things still work out somehow?

So, looking at this, the second bunch is clearly more impactful, but boooy would we lose it without the first to act as balance.

Afterthough:

Should have made this into two properly formatted lists or sth...

On another note:

We seem to have accumulated an army of honeys from various origins and/or harvests. This got mentioned in a conversation on the street corner and as a result, we're having the first not-just-us honey tasting tomorrow. Wondering how to make that not be a disaster when I have no idea whether these people can taste any differences at all, or whether they can eat the bread we're planning to use as base, or whether they are sure they don't have allergies etc... Just too many other things up in the air at the moment to have organised this properly. Oh well, at least I'll find out how many different ones we actually have at present.

Cheers,

Hedi

Shower thoughts of the random category

Before checking - if there is a product sold in English under the name of "whipped cream" which is, in fact simple liquid cream, that's stupid and the product should be called "whippable cream". (And fk if I know how those cans of sprayable plastic with the same label work to decide at which point it morphs from one form into the other.)

In Estonian "vahukoor" is barely passable written on the corresponding carton, since it can be read as "cream meant to become vaht". After the whipping action has been completed, it should, in fact, be called "vahustatud koor", which we really do not. But since Estonian grammar is bizarre anyway, like mentioned, both of these versions at both time points soooort of can be let slip.

And then there is the Japanese product "ホイップ" (hoippu), a.k.a the bastardised word "whip" signalling what I sincerely hope is not the actual cream product, but the plastic whoknowswhatliquid that is frequently used here to make white foam instead of the substance originating from a cow.

Now to google a bit. (Which has become almost impossible, I HAVE to add with this AI bullshit. Asking about the same topic 1 minute apart from two different computers gives the EXACT OPPOSITE results. How are we to trust any information at all anymore??)

OK, anyway, turns out most of the time the liquid stage of the cream should not be called "whipped", but instead "heavy cream" or "whipping cream", which makes all the sense. Except that people use it wrong anyway.

And in Japan, the actual cream seems to be labeled as "生クリーム" (namakuriimu) (sometimes with some extra kanji characters in the front I can't seem to be able to look up) translating into raw cream. "Hoippu" is indeed the fake stuff, unless you elongate the word into "ホイップクリーム" (hoippukuriimu), at which point it designates the aerated mass that can be stuck on cake, whether it originates from the dairy or the other liquid.

All of this is also known as "this is what happens when listening to Tolkien's writings and comments on linguistics".

Cheers,

Hedi

Sides

Taking thick sticky sour cream (not the liquid squeezable sort sold in plastic bags in Estonia) out of a carton is a lot better done scraping with the back of the spoon, not the normally used side. This way the cream mass does not just stay as a clump hiding in the concave bit while you're desperately trying to mix it into something, because you can just wipe it off into the food. Also, the sides of the container can be scraped down as you go. But how after years of living and cooking together D had never picked this "trick" up is beyond me. Oh well, good to know there are still things to learn both ways.

Farm has turned down the tomato flood, gone through a couple of weeks of peppermania and is currently producing endless chillies and Japanese pumpkins. Count of the latter so far is 7 in two weeks, and yes, we are throwing them at unsuspecting neighbours. Today got some rosemary from a lady on the way to farm, went back later to give her a kabocha as a return present, ended up getting some potatoes too, because "those are tasty when cooked with rosemary". The real reason we asked for that particular rosemary bit (to root some cuttings and get a blue-flowered dark green variant to grow beside our white-flowered grey leaved variant if the mole living underneath it doesn't end up murdering it) was a bit too complicated to explain, so potato-dinner it is. This area really is sort of amazing to live in. Even if in the past 3 years they have approached building in a manner such that our "garden" with its single square meter of actual soil, is the greenest space around.

Cheers,

Hedi

Mr pepper and other greats

But of course we stick the caterpillar found inside the pepper cut up for dinner into a box (yes, it's a special one with air slots and a hatch etc) and proceed to feed it our daily food scraps (because after the farm tomatoes finally calmed down, we are now drowning in peppers of all spiciness levels as my lip and skin in the eyebrow corner that I just had to soak in milk to combat a capsaicin burn gotten from touching them with a finger that previously came into contact with some especially evil pepper scrap, can attest to) to see what it grows into... Doesn't everyone? Doubled in size in two days has this Mr Pepper.

But also, yes, since these harvests go from mean chillies to sweet paprikas, some of them looking undistinguishable, I do now have to wear rubber gloves when dealing with any of them. And yes, milk IS the correct first aid, since the burny chemical reacts with another found in milk and the whole thing I believe is fat soluble, so you gan actually get some of it off, while just washing with soap and water does squat all. And yes, it was critically urgent at one point to find this out.

After more years than I can recall of needing a near constant background of wall-to-wall variable music, preferably at least half of it newly discovered, recently if I get around to switching Spotify on at all, I tend to stick to playlists of old favourites. (Good thing they are just about maxing out the limits set by the company at some 8000 songs apiece, or it'd still get repetitive huh.) This of course makes discovering new music and/or keeping up with releases sort of impossible. Add to that a near total avoidance of (social) media and, lordsaveus, all manner of short-form clips, and I have absolutely no idea what's what anymore. So when despite all that I have managed to hear about a new artist, you bet they are Actually Special. So, here's a feast in the form of three people I've (finally) picked up on this year. And what comes out of these mouths is plain unreal... 

WING

Maphra

Dimash

Cheers,

Hedi

Üllatavalt vähe...

...olen ma ikkagi elus lugenud, tuleb välja. Eileõhtust tunniajast "raamatut" trackingsaidile sisestades jäi ilus ümmargune loetud raamatute number 1400 silma - ja kuidagi väike tundub teine. Okei, raudselt mingit hulka lapsepõlve ja kooliaja asju pole meelde tulnud ära registreerida (kuigi mõned aastad tagasi istusin küll oma raamaturiiuli fotodega ja klikkisin kõik paika, mis võimalik), aga suurem enamus peaks süsteemis sees olema. Õpikud ja manga ja artiklid ja kokaraamatud ja maniakaalsed korduslugemised jmt, mida seal saidil ei jälgi, on pealekauba, aga ikkagi - julmalt keskmistades kuskil 37 raamatut aastas.

Võrdluseks, 2023-2025 aasta keskmine (kordused sees) on 183 teost. See "saavutus" muidugi 30:30:30 tänu nutifonipõhistele digitaalfailidele, vabadele digitaalraamatukogudele ja taustal kuulatavatele audioraamatutele. Viimase 10% peab vist paraku tervisejamade arvele panema. Silver lining, huh..

Cheers,

Hedi

Tomato-onion chutney

250 g red onion - peeled, diced into a deep copper pan with a small amount of grape seed oil. Cook until they start going see-through.

1kg mini tomatoes, washed, halved, bad bits cut off, into the pan with onions.

5 cloves of garlic, cleaned and roughly chopped, added to the pan, cooked down a bit.

2 teaspoons of salt, 100g of brown sugar, 100ml of thin balsamic vinegar added later and the whole thing boiled until liquids mostly evaporate and the mass turns sticky.

Carefully ladled into a steam/oven-sterilised glass jar, filled to the brim and closed while still hot so it vacuum-seals itself before letting fully cool down.

Store in dark and cool, eat on bread, on rice, in meat dishes as seasoning or side-condiment.

(Optional step for spice lovers is to fry a bunch of chilli in a separate pan before adding it to the mix for the long boil. Other types of tomatoes and onions and oil and vinegar and sugar and peppers also OK to use. Just taste and see what works or what needs adjusting.)

And all of that happened because our tomato plants decided that 10kg of fruit in the space of 3 weeks is just about the correct amount of production.

Cheers,

Hedi

Potatocado

Pikast valimise harjutamisest hoolimata vahel satub ostukorvi mõni täielik kartulavokaado. Aga nii hullu, nagu eile, pole ikka jupp aega näinud. Koor sisuliselt eraldamatult viljaliha küljes, see omakorda sama tugevalt seemne küljes - kõva kümme minutut võttis aega neid kolme sektsiooni eraldada. Nuga täiesti kasutu sealjuures, supilusikaga kaapides kuidagi lõpuks läks õnneks.

Süüa see jurakas muidugi niimoodi ei kõlvanud, aga et mitte toitu raisata, lõikusin juppideks ja viskasin viieks minutiks paari supilusikatäie veega pannile hauduma ja seejärel paariks lisaminutiks tibakese õliga samasse grillima. Toimis ja toidustus ja soola-pipraga on täiesti adekvaatne lisand taldrikul.

Ülikooli ruutmeetrisel farmilapil on sel aastal 7 minitomatitaime. Paar neist teadlikult oma seemnetest (mis eelmisel aastal poetomatitest säilitatud) kasvatatud, aga suurem osa on farmiala suvalistes kohtades poollagunenud kompostist välja kasvanud taimed, mille adopteerisime ja seemikueas oma lapile ümber asustasime. Ja on tänulikud teised. Kõrgus 2.5 meetrit ja viimaste kolme nädalaga 9! kilo! tomateid andnud. Iga taim vahvalt erinev sort ka, niiet saab oma lemmikuid valida. Muidugi natuke liig hakkab saama neist praeguseks, seega hulka oleme naabritele ja tööl jm ära ka jaganud.

Aga tegelikult tahtsin memoks kirja panna, et veider on kolme täiesti eraldiseisvat raamatut läbisegi (sest oleneb, kas on audiot või teksti parasjagu tarbida võimalik ja mis platform neti kättesaadavuse pärast kasutatav ja kuidas tuju tase on jne...) lugeda, kui kohtade, tegelaste, asjade nimed ja käsitletud kontseptid kuidagi lipitilapiti, aga mitte päriselt, kattuvad. Põhimõtteliselt olen sel nädalal omale ajusse mingi veidra kimäärraamatu tekitanud.

Eelnevasse sasipusasse mittepuutuvalt lugesin õiget raamatut valel (aasta)ajal. Cozy fantasy oli žanr, aga nii tugev fookus oli toidul, soojendavatel jookidel jmt, et pidevalt oli tunne, et peaks pausi tegema, kööki ruttama ja mingit lisanditega kakaod või hõõgveini või chaid ja koogikesi tegema. Problem selles, et praegu hetkel on meil 40C kuuma õues...

Cheers,

Hedi

Rice paper...

... on üks üsna hirmus asi.

Hankisime eksperimendi mõttes paki, et slopdogide asemele mittenisune variant leiutada. Vorstide ja juustuga mikrolaineeritud vormis oli ikka täiesti rõve - nagu kergelt kumjat plastikkilet üritaks süüa. (Et mitte seda võrdlust kasutada, mis katsetuse enda käigus üles kerkis, sest ei taha praegu päris nii ebaviisakas olla.)

Sama asja pannil võis praadimine muutis kile vähemalt krõmpsuks ja vähem... organiliseks (jah, üks a, mitte kaks), niiet päris välja enam ei pidanud sülitama.

Järgmiseks, kuna pirakas pakk seda paberit juba soetatud, katsetasin Tai värskete aedviljade seguga kevadrulle teha (mitte taignas friteeritud variante, see on täiesti teine maailm.) Valge redis, porgand, jääsalat ja avokaado riivitult kolme erineva poe-küpsetatud lihaga leotatud riisipaberis rulliks keeratult ja "pähklikastmega" üle valatult mulle tundus peaaegu söögina juba. Üks kolmest lihavariandist välja arvatud, see tähendab, sest see maitses täiesti roiskunult. D'l sama probleemi ei olnud, aga talle jällegi ei istunud daikon ega kaste.

Kaste, siinkohal vahemärkuseks, vajas ainult ühtlaseks massiks mikserdamist ja koosnes:

30g sarapuupähkleid

30g mandleid

4 supilusikat vett

4 supilusikat vähesoolast sojakastet

4 supilusikat mirinit

pool supilusikat ingveripastat

1 supilusikas linaõli

(Ja mulle maitses küll!)

Seni viimane eksperiment oli vette kastetud riisipaberi pooleteiseks minutiks 1000W programmiga mikrolaineahju viskamine. Mis äärmiselt üllataval kombel muundas jubeduse millekski enamvähem söödavaks, kuna paberisse imbunud vesi aurustub ja tekitab (enamvähem popkorni põhimõttel) kõva vahutava tekstuuriga krõpsu.

NB!d:

1. Paberi peab algsuurusest paarisentimeetri laiusteks ribadeks lõikama, muidu keskmised osad ei plahvata korrektselt.
2. Ribad peavad korralikult märjad olema, muidu kuivavad efektitult ära.
3. Kui leotatud riisipaber otse taldrikule panna, on selle kinni kleepunud jura kätte saamine täielik peavalu - küpsetuspaber alla.
4. Taldrik saab väga väga kuum.

Järgmiseks ilmselt katsetab neid krõpse mingi vürtsiseguga katta.

Cheers,

Hedi

Igavust ei ole olemas

Lihtsalt ei eksisteerigi sellist nähtust ja kõik.

Olemas on mitte viitsimine, füüsiline ja vaimne suutmatus konkreetsel hetkel midagi teha, ja võib-olla ka kujutlusvõime puudumine. Nende neljaga on seletatav 100% ajast, kui inimene millegagi parajasti ei tegele. Sest sama moodi 100% ajast on potentsiaalseid tegevusi (meeldivaid või ebameeldivaid, meelelahutuslikke või tarvilikke), millega koos "igavus" ilmselgelt eksisteerida ei saa, nii umbes kümme tuhat. Seega, igavust ei ole olemas ja väide "Mul on igav" on selge vale ja (lapsepõlvest selle kasutust meenutades) häbitu tähelepanu püüdmise katse.

(Kui mingigi huvi filosoofia/psühholoogia vastu oleks, võiks sel teemal hunniku artikleid kirjutada ja selle käigus kindlasti mitte igavust tunda...)

Cheers,

Hedi

Alkeemia

Kanakaste muundus kogemata pasteediks.

Filee paari mm jämedusteks viiludeks, pannile varasemast kõrgrõhuribide küpsetamisest üle jäänud searasvaga hauduma-praadima, kuni lihast välja tulnud vedelik ära auranud ja liha pudistunud ja kergelt pruunistunud. Samast ribiportsust üle jäänud soja-mirini-ingveri-küüslaugu-pipra-küdooniapasta kallerdunud vedelik, teise panni (mil eelnevalt veiselihaviile kiirpraadinud) loputusvedelik, veidi kuivatatud basiilikut, veidi Cholua kastet ja törts valget veini maitsestuseks. Kõvasti piima, peotäis patentseeni ja paksendamiseks rukkijahu.

Soojast peast ja aurutatud kartulitega käitus nagu üsna tavaline kaste, aga järgmisel päeval sai teist külmkapist otse saiaviilule määritud ja no täiesti poepasteedi maitse on asjal.

Cheers,

Hedi

Vague noodles and slopdogs

Noodles with a promise "to be vague" on the package have become the central player of our most recent favourite dinner. Not the fastest of meals, but simple and awesome Thai-ish food.

Clean, dice and fry 4 long eggplants (preferably in some rendered left over fat from some earlier bacon- or pork-containing meal.) Remove from the pan when cooked and set aside.

Fry up a pack (400g or so) of minced meat with black pepper. When brown, add fresh minced garlic and cook some more.

Return the eggplants to the pan, add some green peas (frozen works great) and mix in at least two tablespoons of gochujang. Add some white cooking wine, water and 200g of flat transparent rice noodles. Cook frequently stirring until vague.

Most critical step: serve with a healthy dose of fresh lime or lemon juice (first is better, second is easier).

(Can also add pre-cooked mushrooms if any happen to be lying around, or if you are one of the disgusting soap-eaters, cilantro is supposed to go with this cuisine too.)

Quantity above is enough for 3 meals for two people.

And then there is the thing that makes hotdogs look fancy.

Slices of the plainest white meant-for-toast bread onto a plate, 1-2 emergency sausages (we usually keep a pack of slightly spicy chorizo wieners in the freezer) onto one side of it.

Cover with shredded cheese and microwave until melted.

Take out, quickly add ketchup (and mustard, if happen to have any), fold the bread over so the cheese sticks together and voila - slopdogs.

Cheers,

Hedi

Renaming

Apple pie is henceforth known as the big sussel. Do not ask why, I have no idea how we got to that point.

But also, having two different apple-based cakes for dinner today. Because why not.

Cheers,

Hedi

The drongus rave ehk prantsusepärane kanapada

It is fun how every now and then D goes grocery shopping and some random electron strikes true and reminds him of a dish prepared in a previous life. Like this one. Supposedly it's French, I'm sure with a fancy name I don't care about, and also a long and complicated recipe, that we, of course, ignored and simplified.

Need:

• tablespoon of cooking oil
• 300g of fatty bacon
• 2 large boneless chicken thighs with skin
• at least 500 g of chicken wings
• 2 young onions (or a pile of shallots)
• 2 large carrots
• (mushrooms)
• 6 cloves of garlic
• 1/2 litres of white cooking wine (or more, yes, it's a lot)
• water
• salt
• pepper
• 5 x 10cm sprigs of fresh rosemary
• 10 x 10cm sprigs of fresh thyme
• (garlic paste)
• (butter)
• (vegetable stock)
• (other provencal herbs)
• fresh cream

Chicken portion has to have both wings or drumsticks (for the cartilage bits to thicken the final sauce) and thighs (for the skin collagen and also to get some actual meat into the dish, since everyone knows there is basically none of that on the wings.) Breast-fillet meat can be added in small quantities.

Cover deep copper pan with a thin film of cooking oil to lessen sticking.

Cut up the bacon and fry it to render the fat, leave the bacon bits in pan (because too lazy to take them out).

Roughly chop the chicken, and fry the skin side in the bacon fat until browned, then remove meat from pan and set aside.

Clean and chop the onions, garlic, carrots (and mushrooms, but we didn't have any this time).

Caramelise the onions, add some butter if not enough fat left on the pan. Do not add minced garlic at the same time, it'll just burn.

When onions almost golden, add the garlic and brown it a bit. When anything sticks, lift if off using small quantities of white wine.

Meat back into the pan, also add the carrots, mushrooms and herbs (without taking them off the branch).

Pour in the rest of the white wine and top up with water until all the solids mostly covered.

Season with a generous amount of salt and pepper, cover with a lid and leave to simmer for up to an hour. Every 10-ish minutes mix to make sure none of the sticky-outy bits (thanks, S, we'll never be able to escape this expression now) are left uncooked.

Side note.

A month or so ago I spotted some herbivore damage on the jade plant (Crassula ovata) that is hiding from nightly frosts in our living room. Found out that the culprit was a cm long brown caterpillar. Took some research effort, but we were mostly certain that it was a safe local species (and not the spiky toxic asshole nor the fucker chinese moth due to whose damage I have to throw away basically half of our trees) so since the plant could take it, left it alone. Except that a few days later I found another one of these, this time hanging outdoors from our bike-cover roof when the temperature was about to fall below zero in the evening. And then there were two. But a few more days later I get back indoors from taking the bin out, glance right and there is another one calmly sitting on my shoulder. By this point, one of the first two had decided to take a tour of its lodgings, so we found it 3 meters away from the plant hanging at the top of the door, so I did initially suspect that the one now hitching a ride on me, might have been one of the earlier ones, but after a while of squirming on the floor trying to look for a little brown stick in a pile of foliage, managed to determine that we indeed now had three of these pets to stare at from the sofa instead of a TV. Normal. Occasionally they kept up their excursions, up a curtain or the mango tree, for example, sometimes disappearing for days whoknowswhere, but all in all, at least two are still there grown to 3 cm and a lot fatter, hiding under a cabbage leaf we hung into the Crassula to vary the sticks' diet. Oh yes, the stick part - when not eating or capering about, they do some sort of stiff-stick impression holding on the the plant with the hind legs and poking straight out in a (random?) direction.

Side note from the side note.

We've been calling them drongu(la)s(es) since the start, and I only found out a week or so ago why. Since everything and anything in this house tends to obtain a random non-word-name sooner or later, it did not even occur to me to wonder, but it turned out that drong (or sth similar at least) means a stick in Polish. So now you know.

In any case... The leaves from the thyme and rosemary will drop off during the cooking process, but the stems will probably get stuck under chicken pieces or sth, poke out of the sauce and wobble around like dronguses at a crazy rave party. I almost collapsed laughing.

After about 45 minutes of boiling check that the meat is supersoft and falling off the bones and taste the liquid. Season with additional herbs-salt-pepper-garlic paste if needed. (Oh yes, can also use stock (cubes), but we did not have any.)

Leave the lid off until the liquid reduces to about a half, then add fresh cream, let it warm up and serve with steamed potatoes.

(And in case of a perfect match, one person gets to eat all the skin bits and the other gets to eat all the cartilage bits, because the other way around these particular pieces are disgusting to the people involved. Wow, what a clear sentence this turned into...)

Cheers,

Hedi

Igasuguste asjade jätk, sest eile jäin magama poole pealt

Mingi teema on värske porgandiga. Miks just see konkreetselt on asi, mis kuidagi veidralt kurku läheb ja siis hulk hiljem ninast lõpuks välja tuleb? Keedetud porgandiga ei toimu, muude toorete aedviljadega ka nagu mitte. Mingi keemiline omapära? Füüsikaline? Täiesti kokkusattumus?

Sama veider on see, kui keedetud muna süües kuidagi valesti neelab ja siis igasugune (sealhulgas vedelike) edasine neelamine jupp aega rinnus ränka valu tekitab enne kui jälle üle läheb. Taaskord, muude toitude puhul pole sellist anomaaliat eriti täheldanud, paar korda pehmet saiakest süües võib olla.

Loodus on sassis ja kõik asjad õitsevad samal ajal. Nartsissid on lahti. Roosid pole veel memo saanud ja eelmise sügise õitsemist ära lõpetanud. Ploomipuud on täisõites, osad kirsid lõpetasid juba ära. Kameeliad, mis tegelikult praegu õitsema peaksid, õitsevad ka tublisti. Ja heinaallergia on poolteist kuud liiga vara täies hoos, sest kohalikud nõmeokaspuud ka tolmlevad. Lumeroosid ja lumikellukesed aga, mis idee poolest praegusel aastaajal õitsema peaksid, pole üldse aru saanud, et eelmine aasta läbi sai ja õitest pole haisugi. Maasikad õitsevad ja valmivad õues ka kenasti.

Ma pole kunagi kedagi näinud nii hiiglaslikku kogust mandariine söövat, kui D viimased kuu aega. Vähemalt skorbuudiohtu ei ole igatahes ja viljade kättesaadavuse ja kvaliteedi osas on aastaaeg õigesti valitud.

Mingi džinn sugenes majja ühel hetkel. Küllaltki tugeva maitsetaimede seguga variant, mis klassikaliselt tarbimiseks kehv, aga tilka kuuma vette või marjateesse segades aitab pidevalt läbi külmunud varvaste verevarustust parandada küll.

No ja siis sellest inspireeritult katsetasime ära kõik võimalikud toonikveed, mis siin saadaval - üks kohaliku firma toodang, üks cocacola jaapani haru oma, ja kolm sama UK tootja rämekallist erimaitselist varianti. That's it. Uskumatult haruldane kraam siin riigis, tuleb välja. Kokkuvõte oli igatahes, et neli neist võib suhteliselt otse ära visata, päris vastiku asja saab neist üks kõik mis proportsioonides. Aga viies, "fever tree mediterranean", on (vähemalt selle konkreetse džinniga kombinatsioonis) nii neetult hea, et ma pean nüüd kõvasti poes enesega kaklema, et seda mitte ostukorvi tõsta.

Cheers,

Hedi

Igasuguseid asju läbisegi, sest motivatsioon tuli peale

Sõin täna teist korda elus oma mäletamist mööda vabatahtlikult kaLanahka. Pidada kasulik olema igasuguste ainete sisalduse pärast, aga üldiselt on see kraam veel kordades õudsam, kui kaNanahk, ja too on juba piisavalt hirmus. Aga tuleb välja, et või, magusa sake ja maja eest värskelt lõigatud rosmariiniokstega krõbedaks praetud lõhenahk võib absoluutselt mega välja tulla. Eriti kui seda kala enda, aurutatud kartulite, hapukoore-soola-pipra-värske kurgisalati, krõmpsuks praetud rosmariini ja patentseentega kombineerida.

Gyomu Supaa poes müüakse puhuti ühe spetsiifilise Poola firma importküpsiseid. Kolm varianti: kohvi-, kookose- ja eiteamillesestkoguaeglähebmeelestärasestpoleoluline-maitselised. Esimene võib minu poolest olemata olla, aga teine on täiesti vastupandamatult ohtlik - no EI suuda mitte süüa neid kui käeulatuses on. Mis tekitab probleeme, kui neid poes nii umbes kord aastas leiab, mis üldiselt kastitäie "varuks" ostmiseni viima kipub.

Luffad kasvasid suvi otsa kottides majaesise plastikkatuse all. Ei tea, kas said liiga hilja idandatud või oli neil (peale neetud hiina mõrvarööliblikate, mida iga päev tolmuimejaga kümneid ja kümneid kokku imetud sai) mingi muu probleem, aga selleks hetkeks, kui öine temperatuur alla nulli langes, ei olnud jurakad veel teps mitte valmis vannikäsnadeks hakkama - lõikasime ühe pooleks, oli teine ikka väga kurgi moodi. Kuna miinuskraadid lagundanuks švammiks vajalikud taimekoed ära niikuinii, korjasime kokku ja tõime tuppa kuuks ajaks kuivama. Kui keskmiselt 30% algkaalust kadunud (jep, muidugi kaalusime) ja paar jurakat otsast pruunikaks tõmbunud, kutsusime naabrilapsed külla ja tegime koorimise, puhastamise, seemnete säilitamise talgud. Tundus, et läks täitsa hästi peale see seiklus. Eriti kuna eelmainit küpsised ka mängus olid.

Kindlates tingimustes üle talve säilitatud kartulid lähevad magusaks. No ma tean, et olen seda varem teadnud, aga kuidagi ei viinud õigeid närviimpulsse kokku aju, niiet õppisin siis sel talvel uuesti. Tänu Amazoni kartulitellimustele, of all things. Sest, nii veider kui see ka kõlab, on see platform Jaapanis vastuvõetavas koguses vastuvõetava hinnaga vastuvõetavate kartulite hankimiseks pea ainus võimalus. Kõvasti katsetamist kulus küll enne kui see selgeks sai.

Tsitruselised lähvad ka seda magusamaks, mida kauemaks valminult puu otsa jätta, paistab. Ei tea, kas seos külmakraadide või ajaperioodiga küll. Ja empiiriline katse on ainult ühe konkreetse shikuwasa puuga tehtud, sest see on ainus, mis meil kasvukotiaias seni vilja kannab. Ja oh sa nuga, kus on produktiivne tegelane oma meetrise kõrguse ja 26liitrise (tobeühikutes 7 gallonit) potiga. Eelmise aasta saavutus oli neli vilja, millest ühe mingi suur rott või nirgiline pätsu pani, sel aastal ei viitsinud kokku lugeda lõpuks, aga kuskil 50-75 vahele see arv jäi.

Cheers,

Hedi

Wax-oil memo

Pure beeswax 1 : 2 Camellia oil = cuticle repair wax, use daily

Pure beeswax ? : ? Grapeseed oil = carbon steel frying pan seasoning paste, use after every wash

Pure camellia oil = hair repair ; removal of depilating wax from skin

Walnut oil = long term non-spoiling wooden utensils seasoning

Mineral oil = non-spoiling wooden cutting board seasoning, after about 10 washes

Rape seed oil = short-term rust cover for cast iron pan handles, reapply after five-ish washes ; removal of non-polar glues (any that ethanol doesn't remove, that is) ; general cooking

Sesame-, rice-, linseed-, sunflower-, coconut- olive oil = specialised cuisines

Candle wax = burning ; lubricating zippers ; stopping rubbing and creaking in household items like a swivelling towel holder etc

Cheers,

Hedi

Kotletimaitseained

Et meelest ära ei läheks jälle: oregaano, cajun segu, must pipar, paprikapulber, tšillipulber, kaneel, tüümian, kurkum, must roosuhkur.

Head ja omapärast süüa on vahepeal palju saanud nii kodus kui väljas, aga kirjutamiseks pole tuju olnud.

Aga no üks asi vähemalt:

Võis ja seesamiõlis bakažaanid kergelt praadida, perioodiliselt sake't lisades hautada, lõpuks gochujjangi ja küüslaugupastaga läbi segada. Eraldi pannil õhukesed lihaviilud praadida. Kokku segada ja riisile otsa. Maagiline.

Ja kaiten-sushikohtade pool-küpsetatud kalaga variante söön täitsa hea meelega juba - progress missugune... kümne aastaga.

Tillukese potis kasvava shikuwasa-tsitrusepuu otsas on sel aastal kümneid vilju. Megahapud supermaitsvad ja meenutavad lõbusaks tegemisega Okinawa naabrionu, kes meile selle puukese paar aastat tagasi kinkis.

Cheers,

Hedi

Upgraded frying-pan tarte tatin

Edits and comments to this recipe.

• 1/2 tablespoon of cinnamon is sufficient. Mix with apples or on the pan into melting sugar-butter.
• Can put the entire amount of the sugar into the caramel, but it's a bit better to divide the amount and mix some into the batter. Also, use more sugar, especially when the apples are sour.
• Different types of apples behave very differently. Decide on adding lemon juice based on the acidity. Decide how long to cook a specific type in the caramel by poking at it - some turn into mush almost immediately.
• Use two nonstick pans. Mix the caramel on the smaller one, bake until apples are soft, then pour the batter evenly on top (not just in the centre in a great flood, then the caramel apples will escape and the centre of the cake will have just dough. Cover with lid. As soon as batter solid enough, flip the entire cake into the second larger pan and cook until toothpick test passed.
• Crush the almonds in the mixer first, but stop before they start to liquify, then add the wet ingredients. Careful about the amount of milk - if batter too liquid, hard to cook through before flipping without the caramel burning.
• 4 tablespoons of coconut oil, not 3.
• Vanilla can be skipped, doesn't change much.
• Can use various starches, kamajahu, blitzed tapioca pearls, buckwheat flour, rice flour etc in the final flour mix.
• Baking soda is OK to use instead of baking powder - there is enough acidity in the fruit to make it work.
• Mix dry ingredients in a bowl beforehand, add into the mixer-wets a bit at a time to avoid a big clump on the mixer walls.
• Eat with vanilla ice-cream!

Cheers,

Hedi

Rat sandwich

Estonian seed bread, thawed and microwaved.

+

Mix of random meats (pork, mutton, beef, chicken - whatever happen to be on discount during the shopping trip) chopped into manageable chunks and high-pressure cooked for an hour with some carrot, garlic, soy sauce, mirin, sake or wine, quince paste, black pepper, chilli paste, ginger paste and water. Meat removed form the liquid and shredded, the rest boiled down to thick sauce and added back onto the meat for juice-retaining storage (because it makes sense to cook a whole week's worth of this at a time).

+

Shredded cheese

=

Rat sandwich

a.k.a our newest favourite summer-food. Eat with some cucumber salad, tomatoes, pickled bean sprouts or whatever on the side for the crunch factor.

But also, the wormhole mystery continues. WHY are there about a hundred BATS circling our house right now?? This is Tokyo!!!

Oh, and a collection of bats is called a cauldron. Just in case someone didn't know this... Huh???

Cheers,

Hedi

Sügav suvi on

Palav on. Janu on. Kogu aeg.

Aga pidevalt teed juua ei jaksa, niiet tuli meelde, et tomatimahl eksisteerib, milles ehk mingeid mineraale ka veidi sees. (Siit väga head pole leidnud, aga mis teha...)

Palav on. Janu on. Kogu aeg.

Tulemusena isegi D sööb jälle värskeid kurke - talvel see suht välistatud sündmus, ära küsi. Aga kurgid peavad Poola moodi prepareeritud olema. Pestud, kooritud, juustunoaga imeõhukesteks viiludeks lõigutud, soolatud, pipardatud ja sidrunimahlatatud, siis tunniks seisma jäetud, välja imbunud vedelik ära kurnatud ja lusikatäie hapukoorega segatud. Tõsiselt maitsev "salat" saab, aga mulle selle kurgivedeliku ära viskamine tundub kuidagi raiskamisena. D emale ka, tuli välja, ta alati joob selle ära. Pidi tervislik olema. Selles viimases ma julgen küll natuke kahelda, sest... soolavesi... Aga igatahes maitseb hästi, kui veega lahjendada.

Ja siis täna tuli totaalne pop-vegan-influencer inspiratsioon peale ja segasin selle kurgivedeliku oma tomatimahla sisse. Time to go viral.

Cheers,

Hedi

Ja see ka!

Natuke hullumeelne päev - põrgupalavus, ronge seisma panev padukas, päev otsa nende kahe eelneva tõttu läbimärg, pikalt laborist eemal olemise tõttu suremas olevad rakukultuurid, otsas kemikaalid ja kadunud nõud, kaks kümneminutist pausi üheksa tunni jooksul, seljavalud, lambaseisund, pooleteisttunnised seistes rongiotsad jne.

Koju jõudes leian laualt klaasi värskelt pressitud (mikserdatud) ananassimahlaga, millesse on torgatud metalljoogikõrs, mille ümber pabersalvrätti nutsakas ja selle peal vana meepudeli oranž kork.

Sest see oli tulemus, kui D'l idee tekkis, et mulle tujutõstmiseks kokteilivihmavarjukest vaja on. ♡♡♡

Pannkooke tahan nüüd ka, muidugi, sest see vana meepudel on mul taigna doseerimiseks muidu kasutuses. Päris kindel ei ole, mida nende ülejäänud kolme kohe-otsi-andmas ananassiga, mis praegu köögis susisevad, teha. Aga värske mehumahla sisse tiba umeshu'd segada oli küll täitsa kobe mõte. Kui ainult homme jälle tööle ei peaks minema, heh.

Cheers,

Hedi

Sometimes comprehension increases from back to front

That moment when you are laughing your head off, while getting a neck massage, while your hair is being cautiously held up, while you are licking leftovers of sauce off a plate, which couldn't be consumed with the previously eaten food, but that is waaaay too tasty to be left, because it is made out of the marinade, which made for an awesome steak, which your husband fried up while you had a shower, after preparing all the rest of the components of a fancy dinner on what turned out to be the date of a couple of different celebratory holidays of various related countries.

Relationship goals.

But also a lament about all those wasted liters of meat marinade that has gotten thrown away over the years before we figured out that it can be turned into a simply wonderful sauce.

Cheers,

Hedi

Kaitsevajadus

Nädal aega paralleelprotsessin kolme keelt korraga, kangetest valudest ja (õnneks) veel kangematest valuvaigistitest rääkimata. Aju teatas just, et asi, millega mesinikud end sutsude eest kaitsevad, on "mesilase ülikond". Olgu siis pealegi, heh.

Aga tegelikult oli mõte, et mul on sihukest sääskede vastu vaja - ei saa uksest sammugi välja astuda maasikaid korjama, kui need raiped hoopis mind korjata üritavad.

K tänaõhtuse pargijalutuskäigu tulemus oli igatahes "vilktagumikud" ehk need jupiti helendavad putukad, millede õige nimi igas muus keeles lõpuks meelde tuli, aga eestikeelset ikkagi lõpuks netist otsima pidi. Google translaator, muideks, üritas meile "tulekärbest" vastena pähe määrida.

Cheers,

Hedi

Random snippets

Accidentally made gumbo of the later Discworld novels kind, by getting into a cycle of re-using leftovers of a sequence of previous sauces to make newer and newer iterations. Tasted awesome. I think they do this sort of thing on purpose in some Indian places with their ever-bubbling cauldrons, but I may just be believing an urban myth.

Talking of which, I can not believe what the students feed themselves with in the lab. And I don't mean actual junkfood here - it takes a while for that to kill one, so some here or there - go for it. It's just that all they seem to eat are either pack noodles, spaghetti or huge amounts of plain white bread. Absolutely no protein seems to be involved in any of it, not to mention any (fresh) vegetables or fruit. In some cases large quantities of alcohol and some sweets are also represented in the diet. HOW are they all not sick all the time??

Food on the way from garden this year: all the mints, thymes, lemongrass, sages, oregano, laurel, dill etc herbs, eggplant, tomatoes, peas, radishes, kabocha, butternut squash, lettuce, strawberries.

Growing or even flowering, but low likelihood of getting anything edible out of it: persimmon, peach, kiwi, beans, asparagus, corn, sunflower.

Cheers,

Hedi

Sauerkraut mark II

Have been pickling cabbage every couple of weeks since January - think I've actually got it down pat now, so here're the updates.

My big glass jar exploded. Did exactly the same as before, washed and put into the oven for short period to dry and get sterilised and suddenly kaboom.

So tried a big metal bowl next, with a smaller lidded bowl full of water as the push-down weight, and wrapped in clingfilm. But the cabbage turned bitter and in the end we didn't dare eat it for worry that something or another had leached from the cheap metal into the food due to the acidity.

So by now I have completely given up on any sort of weight system and the drill goes:

• Weigh half of a washed, shredded cabbage + one washed, grated carrot into a big plastic bowl.
• Mix in salt (15g per 1kg) and sugar (10g per 1kg) and mash everything with a rolling pin.
• Scoop the mush into a screw-top plastic jar and press down until covered by the cabbage liquid.
• Close the lid loosely and leave onto the countertop for 2-4 days. 
• It makes a huge difference what the temperature happens to be - in winter when the indoors temperature swung between 6C (normal) and 19C (heater on), it took about 4 days to get to the same level of fermentation, that now, when it's between 15C and 25C, is achieved in 2 days. I suspect that in the summer with temperatures going between the heavily airconditioned 27C and the natural 40C, I might have to move the entire process into a fridge.)
• Mix and taste the mass every day, press the cabbage down into the liquid again every time.
• After sourness preference has been reached, close lid tightly and store in the fridge.
• Best time to eat is two days later, but it keeps for quite long, I believe... we just run out fast. ;)

Cheers,

Hedi

Beer

I have a serious drought (not draught, ha!) of memories when it comes to beer. For a valid reason, I suppose, since most of what is called that in Estonia, is... cat piss. Or so I hear. Disclaimer - have not, in fact, tasted one of those two things. Upon trying three different versions of canned Saku obtained, inexplicably, from a shop in Tokyo sometime last year, I will not argue against that judgement even one bit.

Oh, I just recalled this nature-documentary-survivalist-dude drinking his pee from a mostly! hollowed out snake (yes, that is correct) in a desert (not dessert, ha!). Brain, go home, you're drunk. Except that it really is not, not today at least... Unless one can get drunk off of vapours from a slow-pressure-cooking pot of a mix of beef, lamb and pork that might turn out to be awesome in an hour's time when the pot lets me in again to taste it. Or it might just turn out to have been a bad idea. Who knows. In the meanwhile, however, I have an hour to kill sitting in the same room with said pot for safety reasons, and I've already listened to two complete and two halves of a series of audiobooks today while trying hard not to be in various pains and digging about a hundred staples out of chair legs, thereby acquiring some refreshingly novel ones. Don't even ask... Feel free to guess the author of the books, though - current writing style I don't seem to be able to avoid using is a dead giveaway.

Where was I...

Right, excavating in memory banks (with yellow bulldozers, ha! doubled).

I vaguely recall that H once gave me some dark beer at a sauna evening and that those few sips didn't taste terrible. (And yes, I am aware that there are all sorts of different categories that go under the label "beer", like ales and lagers and pilsners and ipos and whateverthehellnot, but I really have not ever cared enough to learn about these.)

And at another time in a beer bar with A and... and... shoot, forgot her name... this is a bit embarrassing... M? Whatever, name not actually crucial to the story... we drank something that was basically cherry juice with a touch of a kick to it that was actually tasty. (Why on earth we were in a beer bar in Tallinn in the first place, is a mystery, though, because as much as I recall, none of us actually liked neither beer, nor the city.) Also I'm not sure that beverage was technically even beer.

There is also the curious incident of the Octoberfest in April. In Odaiba, Japan. Hmpfffft. I am almost very certain that I have either properly written about, or at least mentioned it before, but just spent 20 minutes looking for it from the borderline-frustrating UI of this blog writing site, and couldn't find a hint of it. In any case, I somehow ended up there (probably Y's fault) oh, perhaps ten years ago? Or five? And just to set things straight, the unclarity here is not due to what one would expect all sorts of unclarities to stem from when it comes to Octoberfests, whatever month they happen to be held in. No, I seem to just be continuously temporally lost. (Blame that wormhole over our roof, if you have to.) But just to prove that it wasn't all (only) in my imagination, here's a link that claims they are still at it. Meanwhile, I spent my time carefully avoiding any beer there, that much I recall. Except for one, uh, thing they called a beer cocktail that came about due to the free drink ticket I got from somewhere (potentially from buying an entrance ticket to the festival area... not that I have any memory of anything like that, but it's just a popular way to do things here. The alternative that someone just gave me one, is equally plausible, though. Comes with the territory of being young and blonde (ha!) in Japan with many drunk, er.. let's call them gentlemen, shall we, around.) ... ... ... What I meant to say is - that drink was disgusting.

Besides those, there was a rather unwanted experience of having to clean out a sauna room after some friends had decided to use beer as a substitute to an aroma oil. (Any worse use-cases and or cleaning-up-needed events I outright refuse to remember.)

And that's it. Those were ALL of the instances where this particular beverage has ever crossed through my life in more than the periphery that I know of. Until, in the beginning of this week, D went for a quick work meeting, ended up having coffee in a park, shopping for used guitars and summer shorts, bumping into a student to give some impromptu counselling, and arriving at home late at night with a couple of imported wheat beers from a discount shop, which, out of morbid curiosity, I tasted, and, as it turned out, liked.

No, for real. Yes, my body's chemical balances are clearly in a complete whack right now (tmi to describe how I know, but an annoyed head toss towards those pains I keep having to try to not be in), so just to keep things interesting, I also keep having urges to eat and drink irregular stuff, but still. I really enjoyed the taste of beer. Beer! Totally absurd.

As was the physical effect of the thing, because everything went noodly. So there I am, flopped on the sofa, almost unable to move a hand, but at the same time being able to keep level with, or even slightly get one up on any and all the witty remarks/puns etc coming from D (which is NOT a typical state of affairs because his ability to connect completely random things to other completely random things in the most hilariously clever manner possible for any and all purposes, is a bit out of this world... hence me keeping a file dedicated to his sayings that have provided hours of laughter cramps.)

Oh, and for reference, none of the "typical" effects of other types of alcohol like a spinning head, loss of coordination, slurring of words, slowed thinking, more talking or sleepiness showed up. So that's a box I didn't know existed ticked in the bucket list.

And then things escalated. Because the next day was a) nice (read: one of the few days of the year here, when it is not hellishly hot, too cold or too wet to get out and about), b) a weekday (read: crowds not quite dense enough to require extreme measures to survive in), and c) a rare instance when neither of us had to deal with an x amount of admin in places where we really would rather not be for reasons utterly out of the realm of logic (read: amazing.) So we went for a bike ride to the same area D had been the day before, aaaaand returned having bought the entire stock of that particular discounted beer the shop had and a couple of other types to try. (And some shorts. And a pair of shoes. Luckily, no guitars.) Still not quite certain why... However, I did get to be "the most attractive sounding girl on the street" due to the loud bottle-clinking emanating from my bike bags (which are a life-saver, by the way, and I don't mean just for carrying large quantities of bottles in). Also - see what I mean by clever sayings?

So, naturally, those new types got taste-tested that evening and [insert crying smiley face here (ha!)] I liked three of those too. For balance there were also two that I would have willingly poured down the toilet, so all is not lost, but still - there now exist four types of beer that I, apparently, drink.

Two of those are mass-produced imported (I think German and Dutch) wheat beers, and the other two are by a small hipster Japanese brewery no one has ever heard of, which I think actually deserves to be linked here for that reason alone. The fact that the brewery turned out to be located a bit upstream on the river that runs through our local park, is... hm... actually not so unexpected, as one might think, considering how strange things keep being around here recently. Anyway - their white barley beer is basically like grapefruit juice for adults and the wheat+barley one is the same with some grape juice mixed in.

So. If it's a weissbeer, preferentially made with wheat and an average hops concentration, cloudy not clear, with the least amount of carbonation you can get, and at room temperature, there is a chance it actually qualifies as drinkable. Huh, never would have guessed.

And then things escalated. Again. Because that second type of European import beer (that confusingly tasted just like caramel lemonade) was also a limited stock item, soooo... D went to the office for a bit and arrived home late at night with two boxes of that. Meaning that we now have a stockroom's worth of beer at home. (Luckily no chance of the same happening with that fancy brewery stuff since it's three times the price...)

Fun part is... Since alcohol, carbonated anything and wheat (as well as sugar) are a huge NOOOPE, until my body decides to calm the fk down again, which may or may not happen, like, ever, I can't drink ANY of it.

The slow-cooked meat mix turned out great, by the way - all of it tastes like mutton now, which I do not mind at all.

Cheers,

Hedi

Finally found a group I belong to!

As a random-ass-music-constantly-playing-in-head person, upon seeing it, I thought that this post is one of the most ingenious ideas of recent times. Then I read the comments underneath. :P

On the other hand, pan-frying a day-past-the-expiry-date white fish (not a clue what type it was, even if I could read the kanji, probably wouldn't know... seriously, the fish-related lectures and stuff just ran completely through my brain in uni... multiple puns intended) in also expired buckwheat flour with paprika powder and coconut oil, served with the leftover paprika-flour mixed with some egg-milk and turned into pancakes, is an absolutely terrible idea from start to finish. Like, really really terribly terrible. Like, had to open the small imported Vana Tallinn bottle to make sure the "lunch" didn't reappear terrible.

Cheers,

Hedi

Toit, kuhu kartul kohe kindlasti EI kuulu

Mis on külm, näeb D sõnul välja nagu värvimata junn, sisaldab kaheldavat moosi ja maitseb küünelakieemaldi, sulanud plastiku, rääsunud või, soola, šokolaadi ja vanilje järgi?

Kartulijäätis.

Ja ei, mitte maguskartulijäätis (sest see on väga mõnus asi, iga suvi ikka mõned nii sama kui teiste firmade omad pistab pintslisse), vaid täiesti kartul-kartulijäätis. Nagu päriselt, kartulimugula pilt oli peal. No ei saanud ostmata jätta.

Kartulist "moosi" keetmisest ma saan veel pisut aru ehk, kui pingutan - hulk suhkrut teeb imesid ju. Aga siis tuli keegi ja otsustas, et jäätise jaoks peab kindlasti soola ja võiga kartul olema? Ja siis muidugi vaniljejäätis, sest see on ju klassika. Aga et ikka liiga igav ei oleks, paneme šokolaaditükid ka sisse. No ja siis pakendame selle junnikujuliselt kahe kõige plastikumase libavahvlipaadi (muidugi kartuli "silmad" ka selle massi mustrisse pressitud) vahele, mis seni leiutatud on...

Cheers,

Hedi

Cotlettes

Re-discovered cutlets this year. And no, I have no idea how to spell the word correctly in any language, apparently, since "cutlet" seems to be more of a small steak-with-bone thingy, for the search "kotlet" google claims this to be a Persian dish, I have no idea by this point how many t's the word is spelled with in Estonian, and I have an equally small amount of grasp on why I automatically wrote the title of the post like I did...

Whatever - the fried minced meat patties.

Memo for self about the most recent recipe, because that stuff was yummy!

• 1.1 kg of minced meat (mix of fatty and lean, fully lean tastes dry and is too crumbly)
• 3 small or 3 large onions (keep the peels for colouring eggs in the spring, of course)
• 1 large carrot
• 1/3 loaf of white bread (found a really tasty cake-like one last time, hard to not just eat it as is, tbh)
• enough milk to fully submerge the bread
• 5 small gloves of garlic (minced, no need to pre-cook, or if, then only a bit)
• 3-4 eggs
• 1/3 tablespoon of cinnamon (makes the whole thing awesome, I promise!)
• 2 tablespoons of paprika powder
• 1 tablespoon of dried oregano
• bunch of fresh pepper
• an amount of salt
• butter, coconut oil, rendered pork fat (or whatever other grease)

Peel and roughly grate carrot.

Peel and chop onion.

Optional step: cry like there is no tomorrow, because fk, this is getting to be an allergy-level reaction - I am not even doing the chopping, just being in the same room, and the pain in my eyes is terrible!

Cut the bread into 1-2 cm cubes, put into bowl, cover with milk, leave to soak.

Cook the onion. (Do not use raw chopped onion directly - doesn't have time to cook through and the crunchy is nasty to eat. Pre-fry onions in butter until caramelised, or at least blitz the raw ones into a paste in a mixer. Frying the onions is a better option because it also raises the temperature of the meat mix, so it is not as cold-induced-painful to mix by hand.)

Add carrot and fry that a bit too.

Put all the meat into a biiiig bowl.

Add spices, onion, carrot, soaked bread-milk, garlic, eggs. (But take care about the timing for adding eggs - if broken right on top of the hot onions, will start to cook at a wrong time and place.)

Mix everything first with a utensil (not "an" utensil, by the way because grammar is...), then go hands in and squish until everything is uniformly paste-like and you get bored.

Some grease on the hot pan, fry up a small test-spoonful, break in half to see whether the middle is cooked through, taste and adjust seasoning of the rest of the mix, if necessary.

Fry them all up, layer with paper towels to remove extra grease before eating/storage.

Amounts above are enough for 2 people for 5 meals.

Cheers,

Hedi